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What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

13.06.2025 09:06

What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

Why am I tired all the time?

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

What! how could you do that?

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

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Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

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Do you know what she said mum?

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”

What do you mean son?

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Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.

True - how I loved my mum!

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.

What can I do when I'm ugly on both outside and inside? What do I do? Cut myself off from the world to make everyones lives better? I'm a monster. I hurt feelings, and I say what was said to me. I feel like I'm nothing but a burden. What do I do?

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”